A Tough Decision

“My basic principle is that you don't make decisions because they are easy; you don't make them because they are cheap; you don't make them because they are popular; you make them because they're right." -Theodore Hesburgh

For the past few days, I’ve been ensnared in a string of 2 choices. A choice whether to continue medicine or not. The option that would certainly cast the kind of life I would have in the future. Way back, it’s been my trance to become a doctor. Before landing in FEU-NRMF I’ve asked myself a million times if I would really pursue medicine. I took the NMAT twice hoping to get a higher score and a higher chance to be admitted. Then my parents gave me their blessing for me to continue my pre-med course, Nursing, and be a doctor. I’ve applied and luckily was admitted in FEU. I was on tenterhooks. It felt like being on cloud 9 because I know that I’m just a stride away from my dreams. Then things started to get shaky.

During my second week in school, a lot of things came to pass. My mom called me and said she has 2 jobs and my father hasn’t received his remuneration yet. It was apparently a recession in Greece. Also my brother was hospitalized a day before my practical exam. I told my mom that the due for the balance in tuition is 12 days after the start of classes (which means it needs to be settled within that week). It was really hard for me to utter those words to her thinking of their current situation. Mom said “Sige hihiram muna ako sa amo ko” This really struck me the most. She was stuttering. They need not to do it. In my age, I should be helping them. Besides, they’re not getting any younger. They keep on telling me that everything is all right but I feel genuinely that it isn’t. I wasn’t able to concentrate. This gave me sleepless nights.

I came up with a decision to leave medicine for the meantime to also give way for my brother's education. I filed a leave of absence as advised by the associate dean. I talked to him concerning my situation and he was sympathetic enough to understand what and how it is. He said “Iho, please try to come back when you want. Don’t apply for a withdrawal, file for a leave of absence instead so that when you come back, you won't have to undergo the whole process of application again. You belong to the first batch of applicants which means you belong to the cream of the crop (I didn’t know that).”

To my parents, I’m sorry if I wasted a semester. I promise to work and amend the expenses you had for my schooling. If I hadn’t made this decision, it would have gotten more convoluted. Time will come that everything will turn out fine.

To my 1C classmates, thank you because I had the chance to spend two weeks with you. I may not have known you all but I believe and I pray that you will make it. I know that you will be what you aspire to be. Chase your dreams. You are what you think. Good luck future doctors. God bless all of you.

Richard Gadiaza signing off… :-)